What would you do if you weren’t afraid?

Does fear prevent you from doing what you really want to do with your life? Does fear keep you stuck? Are you afraid to fail or speak your truth? If you weren’t afraid, what would you do differently?

A state of fear creates anxiety and that anxiety can run our lives. We are looking for security and certainty and ways to manage our anxiety. We want things to feel safe, secure and somewhat predictable. Many want to know what is coming next and really don’t like change because they are afraid of it. So we live our lives trying to create certainty and play it safe. One day you wake up and realize that you feel stuck and are ready to not let fear dominate your thinking and decisions.

It is absolutely possible to conquer a fear. It starts with a desire to face it.

Below are a few initial steps to begin the process of moving through fears to get to the other side. 

1. Sit down and write about what you would do or change if you had no fear. What is your vision? What would be different? What do you want to change? Can you imagine living your life without constant fear? Are you willing to let it go? 
2. Identify your blocking beliefs and when and where the fear began. Where did these beliefs come from? Are they old? Do they hold you back? When did the fear begin? How old were you? These are key questions to begin unpacking the fear and not letting it take over and control you. Fears often come from past experiences. It’s important to reflect on them and how they have played a role in your life. We can make a conscious choice to not let them control our way of life.
3. Build a strong support network. Surround yourself with people that encourage you and help you step outside of your comfort zone to grow and evolve. Ask for help if you need it in order to not let it control your thoughts and beliefs. 
4. Be willing to be uncomfortable. Sometimes we have to move through the discomfort in order to overcome and work through the fear. Be willing to take a chance knowing the payoffs are significant.
5. Reframe what failure means. Does failure mean the end of the world? Absolutely not! It means you learn the lesson you need in order to grow to the next level. Everything in our lives is a learning opportunity. The greatest leaders make uncomfortable decisions and move through their fears in order to align with what they believe it the right decision. 

This will be one of the best decisions you will ever make! It might be hard work, but it is so worth it! 

Kristen Boice, M.A., LMFT, EMDR-Trained